Day 5 : 24/03/2011 : 100 calories

I fucked up badly!! I thought today was a 300 calorie day so I ate 300 calories but it's actually 100 calories!! I want to kick myself.

I am going to have 200 calories tomorrow (stick with the plan) and then have 100 calories on Saturday instead of today...so I've basically switched the two days around. I don't think it's going to make any difference overall to be honest which is good because when I fuck up on my 'diet' I go one of two ways: I either purge until I'm bleeding or I just eat more and more (and more) and manage to purge about half...so I'm glad I'm OK about it and not panicking.

So here's what I've eaten today:
Vegetable cup-a-soup (which was creamy & divine!) : 121
Philadelphia light Splendips (crackers, cream cheese & chutney) : 141
2x Sprite zero : 12
Cup of tea with tiniest bit of milk & a sweetner : <20

Total : 294

I loved the Splendips! You get 10 crackers which I broke into halves to make it last longer and you dip them in the light cheese and the chutney. The chutney was sweet/tangy so my sweet tooth is happy and the crackers were savory so I go the best of both. I also chewed each piece 20 times before swallowing :D

I am going to my mum's tonight to talk about me moving home....my drink/drugs have got out of control and she feels I need some help so I have to go but it's going to be so hard there because my parents always have junk in. Both are in their mid 40s with good jobs and work out but they still eat lots, especially sweets at night with a film.

At my sister's I never snack because she buys the food (I give her money each month) I feel like it's HER food and not mine and I have to eat what she gives me for tea...I prefer this because then I feel like I can't just open the fridge and grab something ya know?? So moving home will be difficult. I'll just have to make sure I buy my weekly food and set it aside in a cupboard somewhere so I'm not near the rest of the food in the house (if that makes sense). One good thing about my parents is they don't usually eat an evening meal so I won't be faced with that when I get home from work.

I thought I'd add my favourite thinspo picture, just becuase her starting weight is similar to mine, the time frame is similar and the body shape is similar...so it shows me a realistic goal and what to aim for. I'm hoping I can achieve this in less than 6 months because of the ABC diet and the results people have had from it. Anyways, here ya go:

H xxxx